Perseverance, Girls Understanding the Importance of this Character Strength

Eighth grader Natalie shared the character strength of perseverance with all of us at this week’s All School Meeting through a quote that spoke to her: I can’t change the direction of the wind, but I can adjust my sails to always reach my destination. Jimmy Dean

This is the second time that one of the 8^th grade girls chose perseverance since September. Perhaps this speaks to the girls’ understanding of the importance of this character strength in meeting their own goals and in life.

 

Whether it is a growth mindset, stories about the thousands of times Michael Jordan worked on bettering his free throws, or Marie Curie stating that it is only with confidence and perseverance that we can achieve what others call the unachievable, it does come down to focusing on specific goals, the effort we put into them, and having the patience to know it is a process. Developing resilience to withstand the ups and downs in that kind of process is no easy task. And it is one of the most difficult things a parent does, watching their daughter or son fail, wanting to make it all right, putting that bandaid on, but recognizing it’s in getting up again by herself that is important. If you haven’t read one of our Founding Head Ann Clarke’s favorites, The Blessing of a Skinned Knee, by Wendy Mogel, Ph.D. or The Gift of Failure: How the Best Parents Learn to Let Go So Their Children Can Succeed by Jessica Lahey, they are worth the read.

 

I knew a fairly successful actor years ago whose teacher told her that there were hundreds of talented actors, female and male, who had left the craft, tired of rejection, but it was those actors who had the confidence in their talent and craft and the perseverance to stay with it who were successful. Of course, we have all heard of those success stories deemed overnight ones, whether in acting or in business, but rarely is that the case. It is through persevering that most often we feel gratification. Sometimes the destination we thought we were headed towards actually leads us to another, but it is only through perseverance that we realize we never really wanted our first goal as much as we thought. That, in itself, is priceless.

 

I used to have a photo of a man standing on a pier in what looked to be a hurricane, umbrella braced against the wind, his body at an angle bracing himself. I kept it for years as a reminder of weathering the storms we experience as a regular part of life and how critical perseverance, effort, and resilience are ultimately all part of making peace with ourselves as we learn life’s lessons.

 

Sandra